climb up Teenage and the purpose
                          chapter 1                                          

I was crying by holding my mum. I can't even remember what actually I murmured in her ears but at least I know it was something like this, "I don't want to leave you. I won't study..." So my story just starts with the departure. How would a 6 years old girl figure out what life has kept for her?

It was about four hours journey and I was on the lab of my uncle little excited for seeing the car for the first time. And I wondered what if my papa, mummy and my little brother Roshan be with me.We were heading towards one of the remotest place kabesa, punakha. The stiff cliff of Wangdi made me more miserable and the red texture of the soil gave me tiredness. We reached at Sirigang,the place where the road of Kabesa ended. So we had to climb up the hill towards the scattered village. 

I was admitted in class PP in 1999 in kabesa lower secondary school, and it was really a tough year for me. We were five at my uncle's house; me, and my two cousin sisters along with their two children. It was hard for him even to support us both financially. Our expenditure would exceed his salary. But excellently he would manage everything for us. His son, one year younger than me Isaac was also admitted with me.

It was my first day school. I placed at the third row, a dark colored girl with tears in her eyes. It was a challenge for me. The dashing and the noises like a cacophony of the innocent children under the hot sun with full dress code. And for a Shy and timid girl like me, it was a hell. 

The morning prayer started with the sweet tones of our seniors interrupted with the cacophony made by us. The students of my batch including myself were all busy in our own small dreams. Shortly after the assembly, I can still remember a fat and bold headed boy slapping me and humorously my younger brother fighting for me. 

We were asked to follow one male teacher, really handsome and energetic teacher with a long green book in his hand. And we were following him like in the pied piper of Hamelin. 

We were at our class howling and dragging the tables. Our class teacher gave each one of us the seats. We were divided into groups of five all mixed. Unluckily the same boy who slapped me was also in my group. I feared him so much then after.

'Nga choegi lopeon ain..' our teacher said at the very first meet of which the meaning I knew only later, I am your teacher. His name was Sangay Tenzin and was the first person whom I called 'sir'. He was so gentle to deal with the wild children like us. I liked him from the first time itself.

It took only several weeks to learn Dzongkha dialect for me, by mingling with so many friends. And after one month I began to tell," my name is Hannah Rai". 

We started to shout, "Good morning Sir" when our sir came and was followed by "thank you sir" when he said to sit down. It became usual thing from then.

It was so difficult for me. My kira would be hanging with tailed Kera. The shoes would turn into dusty rock. And another major problem was I would get lost finding my class, but thanks to my cousin sisters of class four and six who helped me.

Beloved teachers,

"The dream begins with a teacher who believes in you, who tugs and pmehes and leads you to the next plateau, sometimes poking you with a sharp stick called "truth."  (Dan Rather).

You all have made me to dream high, and sharpen our thought and instilled value in me that gives me an everlasting hope in all the circumstances. I am sharpened and depleted by you all. I never realized when you all left me with your imprinted impression. I feel so lucky to be guided and taught by you all. Like all the professions, I felt you all entered into my life, but I never tried to peek into what you all have made me to be. Now I realize it. You were only out of many who expected great and hoped high from me, who had the eagerness to see your students being valuable. Besides holding the text book, you all have enriched me with ever green value in me which makes me a human.

Now I am going to be what you all are, but I am doubtful whether I will leave the same impression on my students like you all did. But I would also promise that I will never let you all down. The inspiration you left on me is perfect and I will also strive for that perfectness.

So today on your day, I pray with all my heart for all of you, our role models and wish I would also be like you all.   Wish you many happiness and long lives.

                                                                            With lot’ of love

                                                                              Hannah                                                                                                                               

MY REVIVED DEDICATION

I had always wanted to be a doctor, and I did try my best to fulfill it but I failed. And every one complained that I haven't worked hard. But what if I haven't studied and got it? Then definitely I know all will say I did work hard. Since twelve years of my stay in the school, I have been rewarded for my hard work. But for the first time in my life, i.e last year, I have failed and strangely that year was my turning point...I did fail in the crucial point of my life. It's so painful when we are not being rewarded and it's more painful if our failures are being insulted. 

I knew every body had great expectations from me, and I didn't ignored it. Instead their expectations were main guideline for me. But what can I explain now when I've failed? And if I try to do so, I'm sure nobody will believe me because all we need is the prove which I don't have. Every body now blames me that I did not work hard, and sometimes I too start feeling I actually didn't. The humans' notion is that every thing has to be proven and seen practically and that they feel is in succeeding .But who can ever try to dig out who have made lot of sacrifices in keeping their dream? And who would know how difficult it is to overcome the failure? All they need is the reality and the proven world.

It was hard for me in the beginning  but now I feel I've learned more. And my failure has greater significance than what I would have learned in my success. I have indeed learned about this world, and it's tendencies.  I realize now that I have grown up.I am becoming a woman indeed. 

And the profession that I finally chose is the most appropriate for me. I have to take responsibilities, challenges and pain of my students. I must and will try my best to feel the hearts of my students. I had and have many teachers who really inspired me to be me, and I too want to leave a greater and everlasting impression on my children. As said by  Henry Adams, "A teacher affects eternity:he can never tell where his influence stops." I want to create an influencing life in them. 

And as I start my journey on preparing for my above stated words, I would like to pray to God to always help me not only to teach my children but also let me feel them, and their hearts... for what I believe is that to be a good teacher one must first be a good human and a human needs an empathetical heart. 

I just want to be a simple teacher who works hard as much as their children does and at least bring some change in them. 

I could not be a doctor but at least I will make some one a doctor, and for that day I'm always looking forward.!!!!